"If I knew then..."
There are a lot of situations for which I often say, "If only I knew then what I know now..." Do you know what I mean?
"If I hadn't married that person, with that addiction, life would be totally different now." But, then I wouldn't have my children!
"If I hadn't married that person who wasn't a Christian, my children would be in the church." Again, but I wouldn't have those children.
"If I had gone to college right after high school, and gotten my bachelor's degree, our finances would be in a much better shape than they are now." But I might not be a homeschool mom now.
"If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have moved from here to there." But in that case, I wouldn't have met that person, who has become a good friend. My son wouldn't have gotten the job, at which he's been for 6 1/2 years now (and he's just turning 24 this week). We wouldn't have met that Christian orthodontist, who has taken care of three of my four children.
"If I had known how fast the time would fly, how quickly my children would grow up, how soon it would be that they'd be moving out, I'd have spent less time running from place to place, from homeschool activity to co-op to field trip to numerous church activities or sports activities, and more time at home, just hanging out with my kids, playing games or reading books. I'd have spent less time distracted by phone calls or computer time or TV programs."
I hope you don't have many of those "If only" moments, events, in your life.
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